In 2002 my boss said "Do you want to go on an all expenses trip to the famous Oktoberfest in Munich?" Stupid question. This was all to be paid for by a German company, that starts and ends with an S, so the answer was "yes please".
Since 1810, the worlds oldest beer festival has been held on a large open space in Munich called Theresienweise. This annual jamboree lasts for 16 days and in 2002 was from 21st September to 6th October.
I don't recall the actual date we were there but it all started as an overnight stay in a hotel near Heathrow (I was on the cokes!). The next morning saw us on a Lufthansa flight bound for Germany. Stepping out of Munich Airport into the fresh Bavarian air, we were soon transported to our hotel in the city centre.
We made our way to the festival, which was a half hour walk, later that afternoon. It was set out as a large showground, with some huge marquees as beer tents. Inside were long tables and benches and a stage. Soon the drinks flowed freely, too freely as it turned out. Drinking many beers and joining in rousing choruses with an Oompah band made for a raucous night. I was amazed that some of the frauleins who served us could carry 12 ( TWELVE) heavy glasses of beer.
I have absolutely no idea how much I had to drink, or indeed how strong the beer was, but needless to say we all had a good time.
At the conclusion of proceedings I made the fatal
decision to pause on the way out to purchase some souvenirs, namely a T
shirt and two steins (one being for a missing colleague). Thankfully, passing on the lederhosen ! As a result I became separated from the rest of my
party. So retracing my steps out of the Oktoberfest showground, I
headed back to the hotel, but got lost and ended up outside Munich
Railway Station.
Now I have since forgotten the name of the hotel, but how was I to know there were two in the city with the same name?
I hailed a taxi, babbling the hotel name. Now after 10
minutes even I could figure out we were heading in the wrong direction. Burbling something to this effect, the driver slammed on the brakes
and did a quick u-turn. Now during this manoeuvre the meter was flying
round. In my befuddled state I realised I would not have enough money to
pay the fare, having stupidly invested half my euros in souvenirs.
At the right hotel at last , I counted out my fare in vain. Now I tried to study German for 2 years at school but as I was by this time incapable of speech in English, I can only imagine what came out my mouth was total gibberish. Handing over all my money, I then tried to explain to the stony faced taxi driver I was going to retrieve some more cash.
I vaguely recall getting out of the hotel lift on the wrong floor and trying to get into the wrong room. Finding the right floor and room eventually, I retrieved some Euros and made my way back to the lifts and down to reception, to find the driver had driven off! I then noticed my colleagues had arrived ahead of me and were watching this performance from the hotel lounge. Schweinhunds!
Next day everyone was suffering from a collective hangover. Hardly anyone spoke, either during breakfast, on the coach to the airport, in the airport, on the plane or on the tube back into central London. It must have been one of the longest hangover recoveries in history.
PS For any fashion enthusiasts, despite it being 13 years old, I occasionally wear the T shirt, ( but have never drunk out of the stein)
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