BOTTLE CONDITIONED IN MAJORCA

We have just returned from a weeks holiday in Majorca. It was a last minute job to escape the crappy weather, and not having been before, I wasn't expecting anything exciting beer wise. We stayed in the East coast resort of Cala Bona, (an hours coach drive from Palma Airport) . I was pronouncing it Cala Boner till I got wrong off the wife , can't think why.

Despite planning on drinking wine with most evening meals during the week, it was soon time after arrival to check out the local supermarkets for any decent beer. Sadly, it was mostly San Miguel and John Smiths. ( why go on holiday and drink John  Smiths ?)  However found some German Paulaner wheat beer so made do with that for the first few days, as most supermarkets just sold the same crap.

After half a dozen bottles of the same stuff, got bored and fancied a change. Venturing further afield one day, we found a larger store with a marginally better selection.

So I picked up bottles of Tramuntana Golden Ale and San Miguel Selecta. It's worth mentioning that the fridge in our hotel room was small and bottles could only be stored horizontally. Later that evening, allowing sufficient time to cool , I opened the Tramuntana. There was a woosh and the bottle just erupted, not unlike a geyser erupting in Yellowstone National Park. I managed to capture most of it in a glass. It was my fault ; I should have read the label more closely - it was in Spanish but closer inspection revealed the words :

Carbonatacion Natural

Cerveza Artizan

Craft Beer.

It appeared this was a bottle conditioned beer, brewed on the island. It didnt have an exceptional taste, just a standard pale ale. It was one of those drinks where you say, that was refreshing, then instantly forget what it tasted like.

Now as I said, we've not been here before so I don't know if this is a recent development or what. The beer itself was stored on the bottom shelf of the supermarket so not being sold in  prominent position.

I've been on the website, http://www.cervezatramuntana.com/which doesn't  tell you much. Still, a small victory I thought.

Finally the Selecta. This wasn't bad, not bottle conditioned but a very malty 6.2 % beer. I read a review on "Ratebeer" which said " Compared to the ordinary San Miguel, this is a masterpiece." Quite so

NEWCASTLE BEER FESTIVAL 2016

Well,  Ive just visited the Newcastle Beer Festival for the umpteenth time. It was held in the Northumbria Uni Students Union and as usual it was standing room only, mainly because there were only a couple of tables and a few stools.

There are 3 problems with this :-

1. You drink more beer standing up.

2  The beers warms quicker in the glass being in constant contact with the hand

3. You invariably have to take your glass with you to the gents.

Luckily, we managed to grab one of the tables so were set for the evening. 

I'm still recovering from the Tiny Rebel Stay Puft ( a marshmallow porter) and the 11.5% Barrel Aged Orkney Porter, among many others.
 

Anyhow , before it moved to this venue it was held in the Kings Building, Newcastle University, with seating in the main bar area and in the adjacent cafeteria. Personally , a much better location but it had become too small.

My last visit to the Kings Building festival was a bit of a disaster however.

It was 2007 and  Mrs Ken and I had been on holiday in Cyprus and our flight back was due in Newcastle Airport at about 6 ish. I had arranged to meet a friend,  who was travelling up from the Midlands on a family visit, at the Beer Festival .  His name was first on my phone ( not a smartphone) contacts list and I put the phone in my bum bag I was wearing on the bus to the airport from the hotel. Unbeknownst to me every time I moved,  the phone was sending out a short text " da da da" This must have gone on for about 30 mins. He was driving up the M1 getting all these texts and having no means of stopping them ( other than switching the phone off of course)

Obviously I switched it off at check in and then on arrival in Newcastle, I texted my mate to say we were here. Mrs Ken then drove home with the cases and  I caught the Tyne and Wear Metro into the city centre.

I got off the Metro and crossed over the street to the festival venue  to find it was closed. They had run out of beer !. I then got a text saying my friend had arrived in  the Crows Nest pub nearby with his wife.  I headed for the pub, gagging for a pint, then was confronted by a bouncer on the door who said, " Do you have any ID please sir ?".

"Your f***ing joking aren't you ?" my mate lip read me saying through the window.

Then I noticed him  and his wife through the window pissing themselves laughing. As an act of revenge for the multiple texts,  he had tipped the bouncer off to  challenge me. Bastard.

 

NEW BEER REVEALED TODAY

It can exclusively be revealed that a Scottish Brewer is planning to launch a tartan beer. Not to be confused with Youngers Tartan beer, this will be actual tartan coloured.

Kengormlees Brewery are behind this dramatic news. Head Brewer Joe King said " We have been experimenting with this for some time. There are beers of many colours ; green, red,  black and yellow. If punters can be persuaded to drink Black Indian Pale Ale, I am convinced we are onto a winner here.

King, a qualified biochemist, refuses to reveal the secret recipe, but will say that the molecules of the liquor are engineered during the fermentation process into the tartan colours, which are retained when racked and then served from a cask. The beer is an impressive 10% so hardly a session beer. However, in a clever marketing ploy, the brewery recommend drinking it in pints, so you can see the full tartan ; as having only a half you only see half the tartan       (obviously).

First impressions are a strong peaty aroma, with a noticeable haggis flavour that fills the mouth with an intense aftertaste. 

The brewer confesses this is not his first foray into experimental beers. Last year saw the introduction of Silver Whiskers ( pictured) which he freely admits was a commercial disaster.  

 " Part of the problem" he confessed  "was that landlords didnt let it settle enough in the cellar so grey hairs and dandruff would often be found floating in someones pint...all perfectly harmless of course"

It is hoped the new beer will be showcased at the Glasgow Beer Festival in June, and if well received , the Great British Beer Festival in London in August.

Having tried the beer , I have no hesitation in naming this new ale, First of April my beer of the month for March.

DEJA VU IN DURHAM

In December last year I tried to do some Xmas Shopping in Durham and ended up in a brewery beer festival .***

Time to do the same again. 

 

Saturday 19th March was St Cuthbert's Day in Durham City.
This was the feast day to commemorate the saint who is buried in Durham Cathedral. Various events took place , mostly at the Cathedral and the Market Place .  

To kick off the day there was an 8 mile walk from Chester Le Street St Cuthbert' s Church   to Durham ( so I got the bus). On  arrival the walkers would assemble in the Market Place then  march behind a banner of St Cuthbert up to the Cathedral.  And guess what, just like at Xmas, the city's Hill Island Brewery were having another  one day mini beer festival.

Arriving early, before the St Cuthbert's thing and the Beer Festival were due to happen at 2pm,   I headed up to the Cathedral to do some tourist stuff. In the cloisters was a farmers market, which included a Hadrian and Border Brewery stall. In the actual market place there was a stall with someone from Black Paw Brewery trying to sell bottles of beer and freezing his nuts off at the same time.  As all the beers being sold by both breweries were familiar, didnt bother buying any.  

By this time the walkers had arrived in the Market Place and I bumped into a pony tailed individual carrying a sign attached to a long pole.  At first I thought it was someone proclaiming "Jesus Saves" or "The End is Nigh" ; but no - it was Mike from Hill Island. He was marching round the square touting for business. Some of the walkers asked him where it was taking place. He explained it was just down the street, turn right after the Post Office.

One of the women declared  "Well we've walked  8 miles from Chester Le Street you know !" I still haven't figured out why she said it and what its cryptic meaning was.  It was obvious they didnt have a clue what a beer festival was. Their loss.

Soon the walkers , following the banner and two guys dressed in medieval costume, headed up to the cathedral. So I headed instead to the brewery. Now Mike only opens up for bank holidays and special days ( like this) and his bar is tiny. I was first in but it soon filled up and everyone was enjoying the beers and having a good chat. There were six beers on, see photo, so order all 6 as thirds

Now since my last visit here, a new micro pub has opened in Durham. Called the Station House , it claims  to be the first micro pub in the city, despite being 10 times the size of the brewery. Mike pointed out, his tiny bar has been going for a lot longer.

In between Hill Island and the Station House is a Wetherspoons. Their spring Beer Festival was on so I had a look in. It was heaving , 2 deep at the bar. Bugger that, off to the Station House.

This pub, having opened in December 2015 by 2 CAMRA members, serves 4 cask and 4 real ciders. There is no music, no TV, just a place for a chat ( like Hill Island). I had a cracking pint of Tyne Bank Farmhouse Saison, and enjoyed another good chat with a punter and the manageress.

Soon it was time to head off to the bus station and home. On the bus I reflected that Hill Island and the Station House were competing with the mighty Wetherspoons. So although I cant knock Spoons beers or prices,  for me that day , there was no contest. 

Good beer, simple surroundings and good crack.

***
XMAS VISIT TO HILL ISLAND BREWERY

FAIRYTALE FROM NEWCASTLE

Once upon a time Show White Beard and the Seven Drunks went on a pub crawl in Gosforth  ( North Newcastle).  It would prove to be a long day, with excitement and disappointment in equal measure. We do these pub crawls about five times a year and one of our number , Mr Interrogator, compiles a quiz for which we passionately compete for a trophy.

Meeting up at Haymarket Bus station in Newcastle,  we boarded a bus to take us on the 10 minute journey to Gosforth High Street. Our first encounter  was  an  11am breakfast in the Job Bulman, a Wetherspoons.  This one is named after a local doctor, who in the 18th century, had a hand in the development of this suburb. It was quite busy but we managed to get an 8 seater table.

On the bus Mr  Cockney made a startling observation -  that all Wetherspoons appear to be named after people ! What, like the Milecastle, The Union Rooms, The Lambton Worm you mean ?

One of the beers on offer was from Hambletons and was called Hooker. " Can I have a hooker please ?" The barman didnt flinch. Last week I asked for a Smoked Rat in Fitzgeralds in Sunderland. ( that's a beer from the Rat brewery, not a local delicacy)

Anyhow, back to the story. All of the pubs we planned to visit after breakfast were about 2 minutes walk from each other; the pubs being

The County

Brandling Arms

Queen Victoria

Gosforth.

Its worth mentioning at this point that several footy matches would be taking place during our visit, including Newcastle Utd playing at home about 3 miles away. 

But first, The County just down the High Street, where the Spurs Arsenal game was about to start live on TV. This pub makes regular appearances in the Good Beer Guide, with 8 ales available.

We started the quiz and enjoyed a couple of pints. Mr Cockney was disappointed with Arsenal getting a draw, so we left for the Brandling Arms. On the way out I turned round and saw a sign i had missed on the way in, indicating CAMRA members get 10% discount. I had just bought 14 pints of real ales out of the kitty ! Why no sign inside behind the bar ? Humph.

The Brandling Arms was the only pub on the day I hadn't been into before. It looked posh on the outside and this was the case on the inside with 3 handpulls on the bar. There weren't many punters in and we soon found out why - the round came to over £30.  

" How much" we all chorused.

Only stayed for one....too upmarket for us lot.

By now the 3pm footy matches had kicked  off so along the High Street to the Queen Victoria. There were a few customers in but we still managed to squeeze the 8 of us round a table for 6.

This time I asked the right question of the barmaid , "Do you do CAMRA discount ?". 

"Yes" came the reply "and a loyalty card - buy 7 pints and get a free pint in the next round" - sorted *. 

By now some gloom descended over 2 of our party, Mr Black and Mr White were seeing Newcastle Uniteds score on the TV vidiprinter go from 0-0 to 1-3 by the end of the game ( they were at home to Bournemouth). By contrast , the Sunderland supporters among us were briefly euphoric, taking the lead away at Southampton, only to succumb to an injury time  equaliser. Then to top it all, the menu was removed from the table, as there were mutterings about needing more food.

"But Ive got this loyalty card for another round "  I cried to deaf ears. It was wasted - a pub with food was needed. 

So over the road to our last bar of the day , the Gosforth Hotel.  The pub was busy with 6 handpulls in use. Prices on each handpull indicated this was nearly a £1 cheaper per pint than the Brandling. There was a quieter back room and bar. So we made a beeline for that. It was empty, no customers or staff.

Now when you have had a few beers sometimes its best to concentrate. On entering the room, straight ahead is the actual back of the bar, so if you're not careful , and the bar flap is open, you end up walking behind the bar instead of in front.  Mr Naughty did this and was about to pose for me to take a picture of him impersonating Del Boy falling thru the open bar, when in stormed the landlord.

" You not supposed to be behind the bar" he barked. Given we had just ordered 8 pints and 8 meals, I thought that was a bit harsh. Poor Mr Naughty !

The mathematicians reading this may have noticed only 5 of the 7 with me have had a mention. Well when we were reaching the quiz climax, the tension was so great that Mr Sleepy dozed off. Nearly missed me winning the trophy. Well we had been on the go for nearly 8 hours !

Coming into town, Mr Dizzy felt a bit queasy on the bus, but heading home on the bus and under the influence of a few beers , was OK.  Work that one out.

What a day. ! And they all lived happily ever after.

   * Ive lost the bloody loyalty card, its around somewhere I hope. 

KEN' S BEER BLOG - FEBRUARY BEER OF THE MONTH

We had a CAMRA branch meeting the other week in a pub called The Grey Horse, East Boldon. The usual suspects were on offer, including Hobgoblin, Old Speckled Hen and Landlord. But tucked in the middle was Jennings Sneck Lifter.  As I had not had this strong ale for a while it was an easy choice for me to have a pint. Soon the second pint was going down. Unfortunately I think half the guys at the meeting were doing the same, as it ran out half through the evening, so no third pint !

Still, this has been my favourite beer of the month, despite having competition from Harviestoun Old Engine Oil, Brains Reverend  James and Marstons Pedigree. ( to name but a few)

You may recall Jennings Brewery made the news in recent times, for all the wrong reasons. I'm talking about the devastating floods in Cumbria. Thankfully they are still brewing. I love strong beers and Sneck Lifter ticks all the right boxes. Reddish brown in colour , and at 5.1% is very easy to drink. Its Jennings strongest beer and I just wish it were more readily available in my area.

So where did the name come from. Well a sneck lifter is someone who lifts a catch ( the sneck) on the door of a pub. Some say its the name of a person who does a runner when its his round.**

Drinking it stirred a memory about one of my mates, who lives in Warwickshire. Here is his story :-

" About 12 years ago, when my son was about 9 years old he had been playing junior level football for a local team. They were in the final of the Police Cup and the event was to be held on a sunny Sunday afternoon. It was the junior football event of the year ( around May time) and there was a capacity crowd of several hundred. I can't remember who they were playing but I do remember they went to penalties, which they lost.

We headed back to our local, runners up medals in hand. The guest ale was Sneck Lifter and not being too familiar with it tried some. And very nice it was too . I said to the wife I didnt want to be too long as I had a day of meetings the next day".

Before we read on there are two sayings in a pub that spring to mind here  :-

1. Someone says :" Its my round, same again ?"

2. You say " Go on then , just one more"

Sorry, back to the story.

" After food, the blokes seemed to be huddling together, talking football, telling jokes etc and the inevitable happened. A round started. However I am more of a quality rather than quantity sort of drinker, and trying to keep up with the flow of Mitchells and Butlers session beer was too much. The Lifter was getting the better of me. and three hours later I found myself hanging onto the wash basin in the gents ( in the style of being in a ship in a storm).

The walk home was equally perilous. Two steps forward, one step back, three to the side and one step forward. The beer compass came in very handy and guided me to the front door. Unfortunately after several failed attempts I let a bemused and embarrassed son put the key in the lock.

I'm pretty certain we must have had a power cut because the blackout seemed to last until it was time for work the next day. The meetings didnt go well, I don't think I had enough spit to get out a full sentence.

In the intervening years, I think Ive only tried the beer a couple more times, in vastly reduced quantities"

When we meet up I sometimes bring up Sneck Lifter ( actually bring up in this context is perhaps the wrong term) ; I sometimes mention Sneck Lifter and I detect a look of panic possibly even fear.

But don't let this story put you off this fantastic ale, just don't drink it for three hours that's all !!

** Final thought - if my friend had been a sneck lifter on the day, all this could have been avoided.

 

I CAN DRINK A RAINBOW - A LOOK AT THE COLOUR OF BEER

The appearance of beer is all important. This post looks at beer colour. Most range from pale through amber to dark.  However In recent times Ive come across other colours as well.

One St Patrick's Day a couple of years ago  I was in a pub called The County in Gosforth, Newcastle.  I spied on handpull a beer from Stonehenge Brewery called Luck of the Irish. Always on the look out for something new , I ordered a half. Imagine my surprise when it came out green, with no advance warning from the barmaid. I recall that there was nothing exceptional about this one. Just a standard bitter,  only a different colour.

Time now to report on something with a bit of  a kick to it. So my next choice is from a pub crawl we had around Edinburgh last summer. In a pub called the Guildford Arms I found this one . ( see photos)

It was a Scottish beer called Windswept Maroon - an unfined  blackcurrant wheat beer. The colour was unusual, as was the taste.  I remember the first sip forced my cheeks to suck in till they met in the middle- that would be my face cheeks by the way ! It was 5.2% and I managed to get through it unscathed.

I came across another green beer at the Great British Beer Festival last year. It was called Pot Belly Venom. In the festival program every beer had tasting notes, except this one. All it said was it was green. Great marketing but nothing special about it, like the first one.

 

Ive yet to try a blue beer and  I'm not sure I want to. Ive seen pictures on Tinternet of some sold in  Japan.  Looks like mouthwash.

 
As I'm typing this I've opened a bottle of truly black beer ; Old Engine Oil from Harviestoun. Impossible to see through, just how I like it

This is a 6% porter which I first came across at a local beer festival 5 years ago. For those that are into food/ drink pairings, I had a pint with fish and chips. Probably not what the experts would suggest. I had had a few so the tastes of each probably cancelled each other out.


A previous post looked at the colour of beer bottles. 

Click here if you've not read it :-